Whether it's at family gatherings over the holidays, or at other special events with important people in our lives, these could be good times for us to capture some of the wisdom of the older generation. This is the theme of 30 Lessons for Living, an extensive study and book on older Americans by Gerontologist Karl Pillemer.
Pillemer developed a series of questions we could ask around the holiday dinner table or other family gatherings. Since I’m officially an “elder,” here is how I would answer a few of them.
Question: What kind of advice would you have about getting or staying married?
I call my 43-year marriage (until my husband transitioned four years ago), the 80% solution. By that I mean we shared core values, and were not only lovers, but friends who liked, respected and trusted each other. We were both introverts, so we valued our alone times to recharge. Fortunately our house was large enough for separate recharging stations....he had the living room and I had the rec room.
We were on the same page for the big decisions. For the other 20%, the challenges and hard choices, we were able to avoid major conflict. When there was conflict, we were able to forgive and move on.
Question: What kinds of advice do you have about raising children?
I have to admit that my husband, Larry, and I were helicopter parents. But we knew the kids needed to individuate; we were there for guidance and support. We gave the gift of time, love and energy.
When my son, David, was a toddler, I spent time drawing cartoon animals for him. He would say, “Draw cow, Mommy.” Before I knew it, he was on the floor, listening to the story of Peter and the Wolf, and drawing wolves. He enjoys drawing to this day.
As a teenager, he wanted to go to rock concerts. Larry would drive him there and wait outside.
When he was about 14, Larry took him to some Valley club with live country music. David sat near the front, and Larry hovered in the back. Apparently a couple near David offered him some marijuana. Then they saw Larry hovering nearby. "Who’s that dude?" "Oh, that’s my Dad!" Marijuana disappeared fast.
Question: Difficult or stressful experiences can yield important lessons. Is that true for you? Can you give me examples of what you have learned?
I remember being engaged to a naval lieutenant in San Francisco back in the sixties, and we broke up. I was depressed for about a year, had insomnia, the whole ball of wax.
Then I joined the Foreign Service, had great adventures in Europe, and met my husband, who was a much better match. The lesson: one door closes, another opens.
Question: Did you have any turning points--key events or experiences - that changed the course of your life?
Being diagnosed and dealing with breast cancer back in the early 90's was a life changer. I decided I wanted to live and I did everything I could to thrive and survive.
The biggest change was discovering Religious Science and Science of Mind. I needed tools for positive living and I found them here...especially in Spiritual Mind Treatment. I never dreamed this health challenge would lead me to become an ordained minister. Sometimes we simply cannot see the gift, or the blessing, in what looks to be a formidable challenge.
Question: Have you learned any lessons regarding staying in good health?
Yes, be proactive, think for yourself and research whatever symptom or condition comes up in your life, so you can take appropriate action. This may mean going beyond conventional medicine. After the breast cancer and conventional treatment, my research indicated that those who took supplements survived longer; I developed my own protocol and take a lot of supplements to this day.
If there is a magic youth pill, it’s exercise. I started the Dynamos at this Center because Reverend Mike saw me at a local gym on an exercycle, and suggested I start a health and fitness group.
Very important to our mental, physical and spiritual health is our connection to the One. I use Spiritual Mind Treatment on a regular basis for radiant good health, for myself and others. I know that the Power of the One flows to me, and through me, and for me.
The most important life lesson gleaned from Pillemer’s study?
“Live like your life is short.” Time can pass in a nanosecond. It certainly seems that way.
From Ernest Holmes we can know, “Even in our troubles we are not cast down, and though we appear to be deserted, we are not destroyed. All our experiences are working to the end that we learn the lesson of life and return to the Father’s House as freed souls.”
And so it is.
Friday, February 1, 2013
Reboot Your Life
Have you seen “Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead,” a documentary on DVD? It's inspiring. Joe Cross, an Australian who was fat, sick and nearly dead embarked on a 60 day juice fast, traveling across America to document his progress and talk to people along the way.
He met another man, a truck driver weighing 429 pounds who was suffering from some of the same ailments as Joe, and the two of them transformed their health, their bodies and their lives through juicing.
It was amazing to watch the truck driver emerge from the blob and become a handsome, dynamic human being who embarked on a new career as a nutritional guru. Joe Cross also started a web site to assist people in juicing and healthy rebooting.
So I thought, I’m tired of this fat around my waist. I need to reboot my diet. But let’s not stop there...let’s reboot my life.
Now what exactly is rebooting? To reboot a computer is to restart and reload the operating system...probably because of some new software or hardware or to restore it after a program failure.
Personally, we might see rebooting as simply stepping outside our lives for a moment to view it from the outside. To see the New Year as a time to start fresh and make some positive changes. To do things...big or little...out of the ordinary to shake our routine. To make a Clean Sweep..of the house, our stuffed closets and cupboards, our busy schedules, our states of mind. Redo the To Do List. Empty our email box and start over. Ask: what no longer serves me? What am I tolerating? Can I become toleration free?
Can I push the reboot button on the resolutions and goals of last year and power them up for this new year?
A while back I developed a Dream Big Plan. I started well, developed an outline for a book and crashed about half-way through the project. Just stopped.
I obviously need a reboot of goals and resolutions for this year. Maybe some of you do, also. We can look at what went wrong, meditate on it, figure out why it didn’t go as planned...and then bury it. Last year is gone. Let’s start where we’re at.
Let’s look at what's been going right. We must have done some great things that we're proud of. Acknowledge them! For me, I have managed to do some home remodeling, produce several personal photo books, become an ordained minister, and do some traveling.
I can acknowledge that, put it behind me and look ahead. Examining new challenges helps us to strengthen our resolve to reboot. For me, I found I am still working through the grief process after the loss of my husband of 43 years. It’s been harder than I thought it would be.
But bottom line: What do I want to do THIS year? Who do I want to be THIS year?
We’re so fortunate in Religious Science to have the wonderful tool of Spiritual Mind Treatment---affirmative prayer. We can treat for clarity to define our our goals, and for the strength, energy, vitality, health, and resources...financial and otherwise...to achieve them.
Knowing we are individualized expressions of the One Source helps us to reboot our personal as well as our spiritual operating systems. We can treat and use our feet.
Ernest Holmes would agree. I’ll close with my favorite Holmes quote.
“Today the possibilities of my experience are unlimited...Life lies open to me...rich, full, abundant..I have only to open the portals of my soul and accept that which is ready to express through me. Today I fling those portals wide; today I am the instrument through which life flows.”
And so it is.
He met another man, a truck driver weighing 429 pounds who was suffering from some of the same ailments as Joe, and the two of them transformed their health, their bodies and their lives through juicing.
It was amazing to watch the truck driver emerge from the blob and become a handsome, dynamic human being who embarked on a new career as a nutritional guru. Joe Cross also started a web site to assist people in juicing and healthy rebooting.
So I thought, I’m tired of this fat around my waist. I need to reboot my diet. But let’s not stop there...let’s reboot my life.
Now what exactly is rebooting? To reboot a computer is to restart and reload the operating system...probably because of some new software or hardware or to restore it after a program failure.
Personally, we might see rebooting as simply stepping outside our lives for a moment to view it from the outside. To see the New Year as a time to start fresh and make some positive changes. To do things...big or little...out of the ordinary to shake our routine. To make a Clean Sweep..of the house, our stuffed closets and cupboards, our busy schedules, our states of mind. Redo the To Do List. Empty our email box and start over. Ask: what no longer serves me? What am I tolerating? Can I become toleration free?
Can I push the reboot button on the resolutions and goals of last year and power them up for this new year?
A while back I developed a Dream Big Plan. I started well, developed an outline for a book and crashed about half-way through the project. Just stopped.
I obviously need a reboot of goals and resolutions for this year. Maybe some of you do, also. We can look at what went wrong, meditate on it, figure out why it didn’t go as planned...and then bury it. Last year is gone. Let’s start where we’re at.
Let’s look at what's been going right. We must have done some great things that we're proud of. Acknowledge them! For me, I have managed to do some home remodeling, produce several personal photo books, become an ordained minister, and do some traveling.
I can acknowledge that, put it behind me and look ahead. Examining new challenges helps us to strengthen our resolve to reboot. For me, I found I am still working through the grief process after the loss of my husband of 43 years. It’s been harder than I thought it would be.
But bottom line: What do I want to do THIS year? Who do I want to be THIS year?
We’re so fortunate in Religious Science to have the wonderful tool of Spiritual Mind Treatment---affirmative prayer. We can treat for clarity to define our our goals, and for the strength, energy, vitality, health, and resources...financial and otherwise...to achieve them.
Knowing we are individualized expressions of the One Source helps us to reboot our personal as well as our spiritual operating systems. We can treat and use our feet.
Ernest Holmes would agree. I’ll close with my favorite Holmes quote.
“Today the possibilities of my experience are unlimited...Life lies open to me...rich, full, abundant..I have only to open the portals of my soul and accept that which is ready to express through me. Today I fling those portals wide; today I am the instrument through which life flows.”
And so it is.
12/12/12
Some people believe this date, 12/12/12, according to the Mayan calendar, is significant. Perhaps it signifies the end of the world, or a major global shift in consciousness to a higher level. Some think it signifies nothing.
But for many couples wanting to get married, this date is considered lucky. One survey indicates a 1,446 percent increase in weddings on 12/12/12, versus 12/12/11. Several states prepared for a rush on weddings on this day, including Los Angeles. The county clerk’s office expanded hours so people could apply online for licenses ahead of time.
This stimulated my thinking about a film I saw recently..."Take This Waltz," starring Michelle Williams and Seth Rogen. They’ve been happily and even lovingly married for five years and yet Michelle’s character, Margot, is dissatisfied. Life with husband, Lou, has become ordinary. There is a resigned acceptance, a bland familiarity, in the relationship. When she develops an intense, immediate and mutual chemistry with an attractive new neighbor, Daniel, her marriage falls apart.
Another character tries to warn her: “New things get old.” And, “Life has a gap in it...It just does. You don’t go crazy trying to fill it.”
And that’s what happens. She tries to fill the void, to find excitement and passion, and when that wears off, when the new becomes old, when the gap isn’t filled--her new relationship mirrors her former marriage. She remains discontented.
I wondered, is this Divine Discontent? Is she suppressing a fountain of energy, which if released, could move her toward her full potential, to achieve a major creative breakthrough, rather than sink into boredom or unhappiness?
None of the characters have a spiritual life, and only Rogen’s Lou is pursuing his dream to become a successful cookbook writer. He finds joy in the marriage and in his work as a chef, experimenting on chicken recipes. Margot and Daniel are both unfulfilled in their creative lives...Margot aspires to be a writer but is bored writing travel brochures; Daniel aspires to be an artist, is afraid to exhibit his work and works as a rickshaw driver.
Their divine discontent is suppressed, and manifests as erotic fantasies and games, a broken marriage and eventually another ordinary relationship.
This stimulated me to think about my own marriage...how did I manage to stay married for 43 years, until my husband made his transition? Yes there was entropy, especially as we grew older. Yes, there was an ordinary quality to life after those early years of wild passion. There was the arrival of children and a definite shift to love, not just being “in love.”
Forty-three years is a long time. What's my secret to a successful marriage? I call it the 80% Solution. It helps to choose well...someone who you not only love but like and respect, have common interests and values, and communicate well together. That enables you to be 80% on the same page as you go through the ups and downs of life together.
The other 20% are the challenges, the hard choices, the temptations and how you handle them. Someone can have lust in his or her heart, but acting on it is something else. Or if acted out, can it be forgiven? Or worked on? And more importantly, at least for me, is not to be joined at the hip in everything--that each person in the relationship has separate and rewarding interests and activities. This allows us to grow toward our full potential, to tap into any divine discontent and use that productive source of energy to bolster our mutual peace, joy and happiness.
By the end of the film, "Take This Waltz," Margot is seen alone riding a carousel, possibly lost in fantasy. All the characters are sympathetic. I could empathize yet know that different choices could have led to a happier outcome for all.
As Ernest Holmes says: “We cannot live a choiceless life. Every day, every moment, every second, there is choice If it were not so, we would not be individuals.” There is “not only the possibility of choice; but the liability of experiencing that which is chosen.”
And so it is.
But for many couples wanting to get married, this date is considered lucky. One survey indicates a 1,446 percent increase in weddings on 12/12/12, versus 12/12/11. Several states prepared for a rush on weddings on this day, including Los Angeles. The county clerk’s office expanded hours so people could apply online for licenses ahead of time.
This stimulated my thinking about a film I saw recently..."Take This Waltz," starring Michelle Williams and Seth Rogen. They’ve been happily and even lovingly married for five years and yet Michelle’s character, Margot, is dissatisfied. Life with husband, Lou, has become ordinary. There is a resigned acceptance, a bland familiarity, in the relationship. When she develops an intense, immediate and mutual chemistry with an attractive new neighbor, Daniel, her marriage falls apart.
Another character tries to warn her: “New things get old.” And, “Life has a gap in it...It just does. You don’t go crazy trying to fill it.”
And that’s what happens. She tries to fill the void, to find excitement and passion, and when that wears off, when the new becomes old, when the gap isn’t filled--her new relationship mirrors her former marriage. She remains discontented.
I wondered, is this Divine Discontent? Is she suppressing a fountain of energy, which if released, could move her toward her full potential, to achieve a major creative breakthrough, rather than sink into boredom or unhappiness?
None of the characters have a spiritual life, and only Rogen’s Lou is pursuing his dream to become a successful cookbook writer. He finds joy in the marriage and in his work as a chef, experimenting on chicken recipes. Margot and Daniel are both unfulfilled in their creative lives...Margot aspires to be a writer but is bored writing travel brochures; Daniel aspires to be an artist, is afraid to exhibit his work and works as a rickshaw driver.
Their divine discontent is suppressed, and manifests as erotic fantasies and games, a broken marriage and eventually another ordinary relationship.
This stimulated me to think about my own marriage...how did I manage to stay married for 43 years, until my husband made his transition? Yes there was entropy, especially as we grew older. Yes, there was an ordinary quality to life after those early years of wild passion. There was the arrival of children and a definite shift to love, not just being “in love.”
Forty-three years is a long time. What's my secret to a successful marriage? I call it the 80% Solution. It helps to choose well...someone who you not only love but like and respect, have common interests and values, and communicate well together. That enables you to be 80% on the same page as you go through the ups and downs of life together.
The other 20% are the challenges, the hard choices, the temptations and how you handle them. Someone can have lust in his or her heart, but acting on it is something else. Or if acted out, can it be forgiven? Or worked on? And more importantly, at least for me, is not to be joined at the hip in everything--that each person in the relationship has separate and rewarding interests and activities. This allows us to grow toward our full potential, to tap into any divine discontent and use that productive source of energy to bolster our mutual peace, joy and happiness.
By the end of the film, "Take This Waltz," Margot is seen alone riding a carousel, possibly lost in fantasy. All the characters are sympathetic. I could empathize yet know that different choices could have led to a happier outcome for all.
As Ernest Holmes says: “We cannot live a choiceless life. Every day, every moment, every second, there is choice If it were not so, we would not be individuals.” There is “not only the possibility of choice; but the liability of experiencing that which is chosen.”
And so it is.
Life Without Limits
Imagine this challenge. You’re born without arms...you can’t hug a friend, hold a knife or fork, lift or carry groceries, take care of your personal needs, experience touch from your fingers.
Imagine this, also. You have no legs, as well as no arms. You can’t dance, walk, run, not even stand. No arms, no legs. What would your life be like?
Nick Vujicic, a Serbian Australian evangelist and motivational speaker, shows us. You can Google Nick on the Web. “No arms, no legs...no limits,” he says.
He was born in 1982 without limbs, due to a rare medical disorder, tetra-amelia syndrome. He’s got a head, a torso, and two little foot-like appendages that help him to move around. He has a wheelchair that keeps him vertical.
As a child, he was lonely and depressed, even attempting suicide at age 10. When his mother showed him an article about a man dealing with a severe disability, Nick realized he wasn't the only person with such challenges. He turned his life around, learning basic tasks such as writing, computer typing, throwing a tennis ball, combing his hair, using the telephone and more.
At age 17, he founded his own non-profit organization, "Life Without Limbs." He’s now based in California and travels the world with his message of finding meaning and purpose in life, no matter what.
You think you’re too fat, too old, too young, too unattractive. You can’t stand that pimple on your nose? When you see Nick in action, you can’t complain about ANYTHING.
You can see him on U-tube, golfing and swimming and surfing. And he’s got his own music video, where he sings. And he stars in a short film, “The Butterfly Circus.” He plays a depression-era man in a carnival sideshow who joins a traveling circus, learns to stand on his own, and develops his own daring act of diving from a high tower into a tub of water, from he he surfaces. He inspires others. It’s a beautifully done film.
Oh, and he’s also written books, appeared on Oprah, “60 Minutes,” and other television shows, got married to the girl of his dreams and they are expecting a baby by the end of this month.
He’s made the most of his gifts...he’s handsome, with a strong voice, a great smile, and a determination and persistence to demonstrate his message: You can do it!
God is with you!
One U-tube video shows him on stage, on a platform, moving around with his little footlike appendages, speaking to the audience with humor and charisma. He says, “you might fall down.” And he falls flat on the platform. “Sometimes in life you fall, and you feel you don’t have the strength to get up,” he says. As he lies there, you wonder: how is he going to get back up?
“I will try to get up 100 times, and if I fail 100 times, do I give up?” he says. “No, it matters how you’re going to finish. Are you going to finish strong?” He demonstrates the seemingly impossible, maneuvering his trunk back up to a standing position. So if he has the strength to get up with no arms and no legs, then we can do it...we can finish strong.
Ernest Holmes would love Nick and his example of limitless possibilities. As Holmes says,”...the possibilities of my experience are unlimited. The Spirit flows through me, inspiring me and sustaining that inspiration. I have ability and talent and I am busy using them. This talent is divinely sustained and marketed under a Universal plan of right action.”
Nick Vuijicic is playing the hand he’s dealt. And winning that hand. It’s all about choice, he says. And if you don’t get a miracle, become one.
And so it is.
Imagine this, also. You have no legs, as well as no arms. You can’t dance, walk, run, not even stand. No arms, no legs. What would your life be like?
Nick Vujicic, a Serbian Australian evangelist and motivational speaker, shows us. You can Google Nick on the Web. “No arms, no legs...no limits,” he says.
He was born in 1982 without limbs, due to a rare medical disorder, tetra-amelia syndrome. He’s got a head, a torso, and two little foot-like appendages that help him to move around. He has a wheelchair that keeps him vertical.
As a child, he was lonely and depressed, even attempting suicide at age 10. When his mother showed him an article about a man dealing with a severe disability, Nick realized he wasn't the only person with such challenges. He turned his life around, learning basic tasks such as writing, computer typing, throwing a tennis ball, combing his hair, using the telephone and more.
At age 17, he founded his own non-profit organization, "Life Without Limbs." He’s now based in California and travels the world with his message of finding meaning and purpose in life, no matter what.
You think you’re too fat, too old, too young, too unattractive. You can’t stand that pimple on your nose? When you see Nick in action, you can’t complain about ANYTHING.
You can see him on U-tube, golfing and swimming and surfing. And he’s got his own music video, where he sings. And he stars in a short film, “The Butterfly Circus.” He plays a depression-era man in a carnival sideshow who joins a traveling circus, learns to stand on his own, and develops his own daring act of diving from a high tower into a tub of water, from he he surfaces. He inspires others. It’s a beautifully done film.
Oh, and he’s also written books, appeared on Oprah, “60 Minutes,” and other television shows, got married to the girl of his dreams and they are expecting a baby by the end of this month.
He’s made the most of his gifts...he’s handsome, with a strong voice, a great smile, and a determination and persistence to demonstrate his message: You can do it!
God is with you!
One U-tube video shows him on stage, on a platform, moving around with his little footlike appendages, speaking to the audience with humor and charisma. He says, “you might fall down.” And he falls flat on the platform. “Sometimes in life you fall, and you feel you don’t have the strength to get up,” he says. As he lies there, you wonder: how is he going to get back up?
“I will try to get up 100 times, and if I fail 100 times, do I give up?” he says. “No, it matters how you’re going to finish. Are you going to finish strong?” He demonstrates the seemingly impossible, maneuvering his trunk back up to a standing position. So if he has the strength to get up with no arms and no legs, then we can do it...we can finish strong.
Ernest Holmes would love Nick and his example of limitless possibilities. As Holmes says,”...the possibilities of my experience are unlimited. The Spirit flows through me, inspiring me and sustaining that inspiration. I have ability and talent and I am busy using them. This talent is divinely sustained and marketed under a Universal plan of right action.”
Nick Vuijicic is playing the hand he’s dealt. And winning that hand. It’s all about choice, he says. And if you don’t get a miracle, become one.
And so it is.
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Great Words
I was surfing the Internet recently and came upon this article, TEN GREAT WORDS, by Jim Carroll, futurist, trends and innovation expert. He gives talks based on these words to business t groups, and I thought--hmmm! These can apply to individuals--to all of us.
1. OBSERVE: Take off the blinders and think different, like Apple. We can try new things, innovate in our daily lives. Opportunities are all around us. I’m taking a class in Visioning with Rev. Betsy, and we’re not simply using using prayer and visualization to get what WE Want, but going deeper to ask: what is God’s idea of itself AS my life; and how must I grow to embody this vision?
2. THINK: This is a big one for Religious Scientists, because we know thoughts are things, thoughts power emotions, emotions generate actions. We create our own experience with those thoughts, feelings and actions. As Ernest Holmes says, “Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life.
3. CHANGE: Ask: Am I open and receptive to new ides, new ways of doing things? What’s serving me? What isn’t and what can I change? At a recent workshop, I had an visualization experience, where I went into a crystal palace...and found my higher self. I collapsed into her arms, sobbing. Two things were bothering me. First, the loneliness since my husband transitioned four years ago, and second, I was so disappointed in myself--that I hadn’t made more of myself in these four years of being on my own.
Later, at home, watching a movie about loss, I had a good cry. After I was done, I thought: What was THAT about? These are two things I can CHANGE. So I began working on some projects and completed an E-book. Then I called people to arrange social engagements. I observed myself, did some thinking, and made some changes.
4. DARE: Ask: what kind of risk can I take to improve my life? It doesn’t have to be dangerous. It can be simply stepping beyond the comfort zone. Dare to be great; dare to lose weight; dare to run the marathon; dare to walk the Camino. Be imaginative.
5. BANISH: Eliminate words like should, ought, must; phrases like I can’t; that’s stupid. Banish indecision and procrastination, and tap into your own wisdom on what’s right for you. I’m visioning with a partner in the Visioning Class, and one of the messages we get for each other is: Take baby steps and move forward toward our dream.
6. TRY: Yoda said, “There is no Try, there is only Do.” Some say TRY is a failure word. When we say "try," we don’t expect success. We may fail. Does that mean we lose confidence? No! We keep at it. We try again. Eventually we DO.
7. EMPOWER: When I know I am a person of power and authority, I empower myself. When I accept a mandate for change, to do what’s right and perfect for me, I empower myself. When I know I am a co-creator with God, I allow God to work through me, for me, as me. I am open and receptive to the cosmic healing power, the cosmic power of love. I allow it to operate in my life, and I empower myself.
8. QUESTION: Challenge long-held assumptions, eliminate long-held habits. Really look at them, question them. Recently a friend was hospitalized and it looked like he might lose his toes...he has diabetes and likes to drink. Medical intervention was effective and saved his toes. He dodged a bullet, and doctors told him to stop drinking; I told him to stop drinking; he said he would stop drinking.
I don’t know if he stopped, but I realized that I had been drinking a glass or two of wine each evening. I questioned myself--is this really contributing to my overall good health? Is this something I should eliminate?
9. GROW: There are so many ways to grow, personally and spiritually. Classes here at the Center, groups through meetup.com, workshops, extension classes--you name it. I receive DVDs every other month with tips from professional photographers. Netflix has some great documentaries on many subjects. Online learning is expanding, offering many free courses. Ask: Is there something new I can learn?
10. DO. Yoda would be happy here. Be Proactive--take action. Decide what to change, banish negative thinking, dare to step beyond your comfort zone and make a positive change. Be Bold. Think: What did I come here to do? Who did I come here to be? What is my vision for myself? What is God's vision of Itself as me? Figure it out, and then DO IT. Treat and use your feet! Use affirmative prayer and then take action.
Jim Carroll added an 11th word: ENJOY!
And so it is.
1. OBSERVE: Take off the blinders and think different, like Apple. We can try new things, innovate in our daily lives. Opportunities are all around us. I’m taking a class in Visioning with Rev. Betsy, and we’re not simply using using prayer and visualization to get what WE Want, but going deeper to ask: what is God’s idea of itself AS my life; and how must I grow to embody this vision?
2. THINK: This is a big one for Religious Scientists, because we know thoughts are things, thoughts power emotions, emotions generate actions. We create our own experience with those thoughts, feelings and actions. As Ernest Holmes says, “Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life.
3. CHANGE: Ask: Am I open and receptive to new ides, new ways of doing things? What’s serving me? What isn’t and what can I change? At a recent workshop, I had an visualization experience, where I went into a crystal palace...and found my higher self. I collapsed into her arms, sobbing. Two things were bothering me. First, the loneliness since my husband transitioned four years ago, and second, I was so disappointed in myself--that I hadn’t made more of myself in these four years of being on my own.
Later, at home, watching a movie about loss, I had a good cry. After I was done, I thought: What was THAT about? These are two things I can CHANGE. So I began working on some projects and completed an E-book. Then I called people to arrange social engagements. I observed myself, did some thinking, and made some changes.
4. DARE: Ask: what kind of risk can I take to improve my life? It doesn’t have to be dangerous. It can be simply stepping beyond the comfort zone. Dare to be great; dare to lose weight; dare to run the marathon; dare to walk the Camino. Be imaginative.
5. BANISH: Eliminate words like should, ought, must; phrases like I can’t; that’s stupid. Banish indecision and procrastination, and tap into your own wisdom on what’s right for you. I’m visioning with a partner in the Visioning Class, and one of the messages we get for each other is: Take baby steps and move forward toward our dream.
6. TRY: Yoda said, “There is no Try, there is only Do.” Some say TRY is a failure word. When we say "try," we don’t expect success. We may fail. Does that mean we lose confidence? No! We keep at it. We try again. Eventually we DO.
7. EMPOWER: When I know I am a person of power and authority, I empower myself. When I accept a mandate for change, to do what’s right and perfect for me, I empower myself. When I know I am a co-creator with God, I allow God to work through me, for me, as me. I am open and receptive to the cosmic healing power, the cosmic power of love. I allow it to operate in my life, and I empower myself.
8. QUESTION: Challenge long-held assumptions, eliminate long-held habits. Really look at them, question them. Recently a friend was hospitalized and it looked like he might lose his toes...he has diabetes and likes to drink. Medical intervention was effective and saved his toes. He dodged a bullet, and doctors told him to stop drinking; I told him to stop drinking; he said he would stop drinking.
I don’t know if he stopped, but I realized that I had been drinking a glass or two of wine each evening. I questioned myself--is this really contributing to my overall good health? Is this something I should eliminate?
9. GROW: There are so many ways to grow, personally and spiritually. Classes here at the Center, groups through meetup.com, workshops, extension classes--you name it. I receive DVDs every other month with tips from professional photographers. Netflix has some great documentaries on many subjects. Online learning is expanding, offering many free courses. Ask: Is there something new I can learn?
10. DO. Yoda would be happy here. Be Proactive--take action. Decide what to change, banish negative thinking, dare to step beyond your comfort zone and make a positive change. Be Bold. Think: What did I come here to do? Who did I come here to be? What is my vision for myself? What is God's vision of Itself as me? Figure it out, and then DO IT. Treat and use your feet! Use affirmative prayer and then take action.
Jim Carroll added an 11th word: ENJOY!
And so it is.
In the Redwoods
I had the opportunity this past summer to attend a performing arts family camp with my daughter and two grandchildren, Athena, age 4 and Samuel, age 6 1/2.
We spent the week in a tent, on a wooden platform, with cots and sleeping bags...very uncomfortable, but hey! It was camping.
My daughter signed us up for circus art, which I thought involved painting our faces and wearing red bulbous noses...but no! It was balancing on cylinders, pedaling small mini-pedals, walking on stilts..all in preparation for a big performance on Saturday night in costume.
I saw immediately that risking 70-something hips and knees was not good, so I spent my time documenting our experience for a photo book.
The camp is beautiful....set in the heart of towering redwoods north of Santa Rosa, with music and creativity filling the air. Athena spent most of her day with arts, crafts and games in Kid City, and we all gathered for time at the pool.
I became immersed in photographing our experience, and the many classes and performances throughout the camp... from swing dancing to rehearsals of “Mama Mia.”
I consider myself a family paparazzi...capture the moment; create a legacy. Photo books are my special legacy. The grandchildren love them, and they’re well worn.
In the midst of all this life affirming activity, the topic of death came up frequently from Samuel. What’s death, grandmama? He chooses to ask me because I seem closer to death. Are you the oldest in the family? How old are you? Are you going to die soon, like Larry? Larry was my husband, who transitioned over four years ago.
Who was my great grandmother; my great great grandfather, my great great grandfather? I’m going to live to be 100. Are you?
Once I said, Samuel, I’m having a fantastic day...I’m living in the NOW. What’s the NOW? It’s living right here and right now, in this very moment, experiencing life, love, joy and happiness.
Back in San Francisco, the father was off on a meditation retreat on the subject of...death and dying. I read through a couple of books in his library....The Denial of Death, which discussed how most human endeavor could be explained by an unacknowledged undercurrent of death anxiety. Amassing wealth, becoming a hero, creating legacies, tending to the next generation. These were all manifestations of death denial.
Another book, by Irvin Yalom, focused on existential psychotherapy...as we are aware of ourselves and our amazing consciousness, we are also aware of our earthly existence as eating, excreting beings and eventual mortality.
Yalom sees a nothingness before birth, our brief sliver of life-light, then nothingness after. Religion was invented to comfort us, to assuage our death anxiety.
Despite this atheistic view of death as opposed to our spiritual view of the immortal soul, the conclusion on how to live is similar...make the most of this life, live our best lives at full throttle; have no regrets.
Ernest Holmes says...knowing we are Spirit having a human experience, we prepare not to die but to live. The thought of death should slip from our consciousness altogether, and when this great event of the soul takes place, it is as an eagle, freed from its cage, soars to its native heights. Thus the soul, freed from the home of heavy flesh, will rise and return unto its Father’s house, naked and unafraid.
The grandchildren are not exposed currently to any spiritual teachings. As a grandparent and ordained Science of Mind minister, I’m figuring out how best to help them.
And so it is.
We spent the week in a tent, on a wooden platform, with cots and sleeping bags...very uncomfortable, but hey! It was camping.
My daughter signed us up for circus art, which I thought involved painting our faces and wearing red bulbous noses...but no! It was balancing on cylinders, pedaling small mini-pedals, walking on stilts..all in preparation for a big performance on Saturday night in costume.
I saw immediately that risking 70-something hips and knees was not good, so I spent my time documenting our experience for a photo book.
The camp is beautiful....set in the heart of towering redwoods north of Santa Rosa, with music and creativity filling the air. Athena spent most of her day with arts, crafts and games in Kid City, and we all gathered for time at the pool.
I became immersed in photographing our experience, and the many classes and performances throughout the camp... from swing dancing to rehearsals of “Mama Mia.”
I consider myself a family paparazzi...capture the moment; create a legacy. Photo books are my special legacy. The grandchildren love them, and they’re well worn.
In the midst of all this life affirming activity, the topic of death came up frequently from Samuel. What’s death, grandmama? He chooses to ask me because I seem closer to death. Are you the oldest in the family? How old are you? Are you going to die soon, like Larry? Larry was my husband, who transitioned over four years ago.
Who was my great grandmother; my great great grandfather, my great great grandfather? I’m going to live to be 100. Are you?
Once I said, Samuel, I’m having a fantastic day...I’m living in the NOW. What’s the NOW? It’s living right here and right now, in this very moment, experiencing life, love, joy and happiness.
Back in San Francisco, the father was off on a meditation retreat on the subject of...death and dying. I read through a couple of books in his library....The Denial of Death, which discussed how most human endeavor could be explained by an unacknowledged undercurrent of death anxiety. Amassing wealth, becoming a hero, creating legacies, tending to the next generation. These were all manifestations of death denial.
Another book, by Irvin Yalom, focused on existential psychotherapy...as we are aware of ourselves and our amazing consciousness, we are also aware of our earthly existence as eating, excreting beings and eventual mortality.
Yalom sees a nothingness before birth, our brief sliver of life-light, then nothingness after. Religion was invented to comfort us, to assuage our death anxiety.
Despite this atheistic view of death as opposed to our spiritual view of the immortal soul, the conclusion on how to live is similar...make the most of this life, live our best lives at full throttle; have no regrets.
Ernest Holmes says...knowing we are Spirit having a human experience, we prepare not to die but to live. The thought of death should slip from our consciousness altogether, and when this great event of the soul takes place, it is as an eagle, freed from its cage, soars to its native heights. Thus the soul, freed from the home of heavy flesh, will rise and return unto its Father’s house, naked and unafraid.
The grandchildren are not exposed currently to any spiritual teachings. As a grandparent and ordained Science of Mind minister, I’m figuring out how best to help them.
And so it is.
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Gatekeepers
Do you hear this a lot? The economy’s bad. I can’t find a job. I have too little money. Lack, limitation, scarcity! And yet, there seems to be an amazing transformation going on...not just here, but globally.
In the late nineties I realized that the computer revolution was passing me by, and I went off to the Occupational Center to learn Microsoft Office, Photoshop, Pagemaker, and even HTML and web design. But I wasn’t too heavily invested in the world of the Internet; I used it mainly for photography and email.
Recently I thought of starting an online business, and I discovered Internet 2.0 --a whole new era -- had arrived. I felt left behind again, and so --as is my low tech custom -- I took many books from the library to see if I could catch up. There are Dummy books, thank goodness! There is WordPress for Dummies, U-Tube for Dummies, and many others. Sometimes I have over 20 books checked out.
I became acutely aware that the gates of opportunity have opened, and the gatekeepers are losing power. What do I mean?
A gatekeeper controls access to something, like the city gate. A gatekeeper decides who is going to be blessed with a contract for a book, an assignment for a newspaper, a gig on a network comedy show, a recording deal for musical performance, even a job. Now people are writing blogs, self-publishing e-books as well as hard copies, doing U-tube stand-up comedy gigs, making independent music videos, using streaming video and podcasts to teach all kinds of courses, or becoming Permalancers, who work on different projects for flexibility and control.
These changes have been amazingly rapid, brought about by the tech innovations such as the i-pod, i-phone, i-pad, Facebook, Twitter, blogosphere, U-tube, e-books, Kindles and more.
While I was taping numbers on the backs of my telephone land lines, the net generation was changing the world. The Boomers and Gen-X are already old hat, and the recent generation is breathing apps, wigits, blogs and vlogs like oxygen. Connectivity and collaboration are big.
I’m not even a Boomer -- I’m pre-Boomer. Yet I’m fascinated with all the changes, AND all the opportunities.
One aspiring author, who had nine young adult books rejected by traditional publishers, decided to experiment with a 99-cent e-book on Amazon. She sold books, gained a following, offered other books at higher prices, and eventually became a millionaire. She may be an exception...but also an inspiration. Young Justin Bieber became a sensation through his U-tube videos and went on to become a mega singing star.
Billionaire Peter Thiel, of PayPal and Facebook fame, wrote an article, “The Education Bubble,” in which he criticizes the humongous debt students and parents are taking on for the college degrees required by employer gatekeepers. That may change if the Un-college movement gains strength.
Thiel’s controversial and very competitive program, “20 Under 20,” offers $100,000 to young people who drop out of school for two years to pursue their entrepreneurial dreams. One Thiel Fellow, 19-year-old Dale J. Stephens, is the author of an upcoming book, Hacking Your College Education. He has a web site called Un-college.
So what does all this have to do with Religious Science? Ernest Holmes says, “We are open at the top." We are open to new ideas. As the world changes around us, we can use our tools -- the Law of Attraction, Spiritual Mind Treatment, the power of our consciousness, our knowledge of our innate divinity -- to co-create with Spirit a life that we design and desire, a life that incorporates the best of what this new and changing world has to offer.
As he says:
“Today the possibilities of my experience are unlimited. The Spirit flows through me, inspiring me and sustaining that inspiration. I have ability and talent and I am busy using them. This talent is divinely sustained and marketed under a Universal plan of right action.”
So ask yourself: What talent, what passion, what strengths am I sitting on that could move through these open gates? Will I fling the portals of limitation wide and allow Spirit to express through me?
And so it is.
In the late nineties I realized that the computer revolution was passing me by, and I went off to the Occupational Center to learn Microsoft Office, Photoshop, Pagemaker, and even HTML and web design. But I wasn’t too heavily invested in the world of the Internet; I used it mainly for photography and email.
Recently I thought of starting an online business, and I discovered Internet 2.0 --a whole new era -- had arrived. I felt left behind again, and so --as is my low tech custom -- I took many books from the library to see if I could catch up. There are Dummy books, thank goodness! There is WordPress for Dummies, U-Tube for Dummies, and many others. Sometimes I have over 20 books checked out.
I became acutely aware that the gates of opportunity have opened, and the gatekeepers are losing power. What do I mean?
A gatekeeper controls access to something, like the city gate. A gatekeeper decides who is going to be blessed with a contract for a book, an assignment for a newspaper, a gig on a network comedy show, a recording deal for musical performance, even a job. Now people are writing blogs, self-publishing e-books as well as hard copies, doing U-tube stand-up comedy gigs, making independent music videos, using streaming video and podcasts to teach all kinds of courses, or becoming Permalancers, who work on different projects for flexibility and control.
These changes have been amazingly rapid, brought about by the tech innovations such as the i-pod, i-phone, i-pad, Facebook, Twitter, blogosphere, U-tube, e-books, Kindles and more.
While I was taping numbers on the backs of my telephone land lines, the net generation was changing the world. The Boomers and Gen-X are already old hat, and the recent generation is breathing apps, wigits, blogs and vlogs like oxygen. Connectivity and collaboration are big.
I’m not even a Boomer -- I’m pre-Boomer. Yet I’m fascinated with all the changes, AND all the opportunities.
One aspiring author, who had nine young adult books rejected by traditional publishers, decided to experiment with a 99-cent e-book on Amazon. She sold books, gained a following, offered other books at higher prices, and eventually became a millionaire. She may be an exception...but also an inspiration. Young Justin Bieber became a sensation through his U-tube videos and went on to become a mega singing star.
Billionaire Peter Thiel, of PayPal and Facebook fame, wrote an article, “The Education Bubble,” in which he criticizes the humongous debt students and parents are taking on for the college degrees required by employer gatekeepers. That may change if the Un-college movement gains strength.
Thiel’s controversial and very competitive program, “20 Under 20,” offers $100,000 to young people who drop out of school for two years to pursue their entrepreneurial dreams. One Thiel Fellow, 19-year-old Dale J. Stephens, is the author of an upcoming book, Hacking Your College Education. He has a web site called Un-college.
So what does all this have to do with Religious Science? Ernest Holmes says, “We are open at the top." We are open to new ideas. As the world changes around us, we can use our tools -- the Law of Attraction, Spiritual Mind Treatment, the power of our consciousness, our knowledge of our innate divinity -- to co-create with Spirit a life that we design and desire, a life that incorporates the best of what this new and changing world has to offer.
As he says:
“Today the possibilities of my experience are unlimited. The Spirit flows through me, inspiring me and sustaining that inspiration. I have ability and talent and I am busy using them. This talent is divinely sustained and marketed under a Universal plan of right action.”
So ask yourself: What talent, what passion, what strengths am I sitting on that could move through these open gates? Will I fling the portals of limitation wide and allow Spirit to express through me?
And so it is.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)